Tuesday, September 16, 2008

Only ten minutes away

So, tonight I was talking to one of my best friends. He probably understands me better than anyone else I know. Whenever we are actually within a reasonable proximity of each other, close enough to hang out a lot, we don't. Every time we say "okay! this time will be different, we will actually hang out on a regular basis!" and we never succeed. I think when we are far apart we feel anxious because if we need each other we can't be with each other. But when close by, the anxiety lessens and we get lax with hanging out.

So while we were talking about moving dates and what not I told him that I would miss him. Then a strong rush of sadness came over me -- I realized how much I already miss him. Its odd to me, that even when he is this close I can miss him so much. That usually doesn't happen so much. But I think it has a lot to do with how uncertain things are these days. How unsure I am of a lot of things. (Oh future, how you seem to loom!) I am confident that things will work out, that I will find my footing surer. But, as us humans are wont to do, I have some wobbly moments. And those really emphasize how much I miss my friend. He is often my rock as I am his. And he has already helped me through some stuff this summer, and now he is going back to school. He tends to make life easier, but we both do just fine on our own, haha. And I'll find my footing, no doubt. But I do miss him, and I will miss him more. But I will see him again soon. (Another "no doubt.") :o)

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